Just got into an argument about buying a mickey...
I won ;)
letdownyourlonghair: curiosityleads: disfan: I just really want to see a muppets version of all the america posts because sam eagle would make it all so much better. Yes.
does anyone else ever suddenly get an overwhelming swell of affection for people they’ve only ever known online?
ianisabully: Hey, I just met you…. and this is crazy… but I have no condom, so anal, maybe?
drbippy: Tim Burton should just make a movie called ‘Johnny Depp’. plot twist: Johnny Depp is played by Helena Bonham Carter
Woman v. The Government
Woman: I cannot afford to have a child right now. Can I have birth control?
Woman: I got pregnant but I cannot afford to have a child and I'm not ready to be a parent. Can I have an abortion?
Woman: I had the child, but I cannot afford to raise him. Will you help me out?
Woman: I guess I'll have to give my child up for adoption.
Barry and Steve: We would love to raise your child. We have been in a committed relationship for 15 years. We have steady careers and are very successful and financially stable. We love children and wish to provide a loving nurturing environment for your child. Would you be willing to give your child to us?
Woman: Sure, as long as it's ok with the government.
homosaurus-rex: It’s actually a good thing that the zombie apocalypse starts in Florida because then the zombies only have one way to go and that’s straight up into trigger happy redneck territory. I give it two weeks before monster trucks and mullets save us.
oh. my. god.
furniture shopping with my damn husband is the most annoying process ever.
Kristen quit smoking.
good for her! you go glen coco
batreaux: i’m not like most girls. my head snaps back and a giant pez candy emerges from my throat
jack-sparrow: oh right. the poison. the poison for kuzco. the poison chosen especially to kill kuzco. kuzco’s poison.
Queen Latifah comes out at Gay Pride Parade →
2112tryptophanbonfires: “Y’all my peeps (people),” she said, referring to the LGBT community. “I love you!” Queen performed for more than an hour, rocking the festival with her hits like “U.N.I.T.Y” and “Ladies First.” From the moment Queen told the crowd that she “has been waiting to do this for a long time”, it was clear that the event would be no ordinary. She later on added that she was...
Someone calculated the points of every Whose Line...
edfreemaybe: Wayne Brady: 50,072,587,425 Ryan Stiles: 11,113,372,791.5 Colin Mochrie: 3,012,399,040.5 Chip Esten: 2,004,047,000 Greg Proops: 1,001,122,117 Brad Sherwood: 1,071,980.5 Denny Segal: 1,059,560 Karen Maruyama: 1,004,450 Kathy Greenwood: 59,810 Stephen Colbert: 12,000 Kathy Griffin: 5,000 Ian Gomez: 4,000 Jeff Davis: 3,300 Josie Lawrence: 3000 Whoopi Goldberg: 2,500 Patrick Bristow:...
webothlikeabe asked: ALL OF THE EVENS GO
i'll love you forever if you do this omg
1.Do you want a boyfriend or girlfriend?
2.When did your last hug take place?
3.Are you a jealous person?
4.Are you tired right now?
5.Do you chew on your straws?
6.Have you ever been called a tease?
7.Have you ever been awake for 48 hours straight?
8.Do you cry easily?
9.What should you be doing right now?
10.Are you a heavy sleeper?
11.Do you think you can last in a relationship for 6 months?
12.Are you mad at someone right now?
13.Do you believe in love?
14.What makes you laugh no matter what?
15.Who was the last person you talked to?
16.Do you get butterflies around the person you like?
17.Will you get married?
18.When was the last time you smiled?
19.Does anyone like you?
20.Do you secretly like someone?
21.Who was the first person you talked to today?
22.Who do you feel most comfortable talking to about anything?
23.What are you NOT looking forward to?
24.What ARE you looking forward to?
25.Has someone of the opposite sex ever told you they loved you, and meant it?
26.Suppose you see your ex kissing another person what would you do?
27.Do you plan on moving out within the next year?
28.Are you a forgiving person?
29.How many TRUE friends do you have?
30.Do you fall for people easily?
31.Have you ever fallen for your ex’s best friend?
32.What’s the last thing you put in your mouth?
33.Who was the last person you drove with?
34.How late did you stay up last night and why?
35.If you could move somewhere else, would you?
36.Who was the last person you took a picture of?
37.Can you live a day without TV?
38.When was the last time you were extremely disappointed?
39.Three names you go by..
40.Are you currently in a relationship?
41.What is your all-time favorite romance movie?
42.Do you believe that everyone has a soul-mate?
43.What’s your current problem?
44.Have you ever had your heart broken?
45.Your thoughts of long distance relationships?
46.How many kids do you want to have?
47.Have you ever found it hard to tell someone you like them?